Secrets

We all have secrets.

This blog is my biggest secret. Only my brother and boyfriend know of its existence but neither of them know it’s exact URL. I hope it stays that way.

I have been thinking a lot about what this blog means to me and why I keep on doing what I do. The top reason is because I want to be a blogger too – like the real famous ones who don’t work and all they do is travel, cook or review. I like the idea that one day I can leave my day job but still have a steady source of income. I think/hope that blogging can do that for me. But honestly, after months and months of writing and blogging, I have discovered that it’s not as easy as it looks. I am still trying to look for who I am as a blogger/writer. Who knew it would be so hard?

I have also come to realize that I don’t want to be a blogger. What I want to become is someone who has a strong sense of opinion on things and someone who can confidently share them in a room/website full of people. I also want to become creative.

I also want to be able to share my thoughts and feelings without anyone judging them (main reason why I’m half anonymous). To be quite honest, I don’t have a friend who I can share my deepest darkest secrets with. I have friends, but not that one person who I can completely be honest with. Oh wait, I think that’s my brother lol. But anyway, my point is sometimes we barely see and talk to each other that I don’t know, sometimes I feel lost.

This blog has helped me focus on things I want to achieve and try. I love that it does that for me. I love that I can be whoever I want to be online but still hold a certain level of anonymity…

I guess all I’m trying to say is that this blog is a secret because it means so much to me. It has been a source of happiness and it also has helped me use my energy and creativity productively. It is a wonderful distraction from what real life has to offer.

I also think if you personally know who I am, I’m not sure if I want to hear that you read my blog. I think.

* * *

This is a free writing activity I challenged myself to. For a total of ten minutes, I wrote down what this blog means to me. It’s really nothing special, I know there might be typographical or grammatical errors but I’ll leave it be. Share your thoughts down below!

Kat

To keep it short and simple: I'm twenty-seven years old. Still plenty young, but not as young as I used to be.

10 thoughts on “Secrets

  1. I keep my blog a secret too. Oftentimes I feel like my thoughts are way too personal, and it also doesn’t help that my friends are way better writers than I am. Hay buhay.

    Anyway, I wish your blog success! It looks really professional which makes it a notch better than most personal/lifestyle blogs out there. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your post hit a chord with me in so many ways. Although I have been blogging for three & a half years now, I still cannot make my mind up what my blog should look like for example, do I open up about life & family or do I keep it fairly anon? What do I write about? Do I reveal all my inner feelings or not? Decisions, decisions.
    I have made so many mistakes, changing my mind over the time, deleting blogs & starting a new one up but the one consistent is the blogging, I love it. It is turning into a real passion and if you have that, you will not go far wrong. Keep going!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Only my BFF knows about my blog- it is a part of me I choose not to share – rather only with my blogging friends. It allows me to write freely and not think about judgments people may have if they read it. Freeing isn’t it?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I know what you mean. I currently keep my blog as a separate part of my life with the exception for a few it does not appear on the main facebook page or anything. I think the step going from private or secret to the public is part of the journey. Defining the direction you want to go in and how you want to be viewed as a person who is knowledgeable about a topic.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I found the more anonymous you stay the freer you can write. I made the mistake telling some of my friends about my blog (plus URL) and that keeps me now from writing about certain things as I know they would not appreciate or understand it to the point where it would get really uncomfortable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. In my old blog, I made the mistake of writing about a person and then have him read it. It was embarrassing! I had to explain it to him a million times before he could understand where I was coming from.

      Liked by 1 person

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