Coffee Time
comments 15

Let’s have coffee

How was your week, my friends? Mine was interesting. Let’s have a little chat and catch up! What do you say?

If we were having coffee, I’ll share with you that I went to the hospital to get myself checked. It has been a while since I got my visitor and it’s scaring me. Long story short, I got tests done and the prognosis is I’m not getting my period because of my weight. Well, the doctor said it’s 80% chance it’s because of my weight.

I feel embarrassed saying this but that’s the truth. It sucks so much that it’s partly my fault. I hate myself for letting this get this far. I hate myself. I blame myself.

Also, surprise! I have high cholesterol. It’s just one thing after the other with this one. 🙁

I’m currently in the phase of blaming myself. I’m letting myself feel this emotion because I want to come out stronger and wiser. I’m choosing to own up to my own decisions and mistakes. There is no one to blame but myself.

On the flipside, I am also treating this as a challenge to improve my health and make better decisions. I want this year to be all about reclaiming my health. I know I will succeed. I just need to focus and commit to this one hundred percent.

If we were having coffee, I’d say how ironic all this is! I started blogging because I wanted to improve my health. The original content of this blog were recipes and exercises, etc. I have come full circle, lol.

I don’t know.

I’m sad, confused, disappointed and embarrassed about all this…about this weight issue! I have always been confident about myself regardless of my weight. I firmly believed that I didn’t need to be thin as long as I can run, climb mountains or even walk, I’ll be fine. I guess I was wrong. 🙁

It’s time to improve my health. I will commit to this. I will do it correctly and healthily.

That’s it for now, I want to rest my eyes now. How was your week? Let’s have a chat!

15 Comments

  1. That’s why I try to be mindful of how my body feels, how it reacts to what I eat or do. As a nurse, I have ideas of how weight can affect our overall health. It’s okay friend, just think that it’s better that you know about it already, at least now you can focus your energy on how to rectify that. Don’t get discouraged, make it your new goal to be healthy again. 😀

    • Thanks Gerry. Grabe naman talaga. I mean what a wake up call talaga. 🙁 Nakakalungkot pero kailangan talaga matauhan minsan para maging mas okay diba!

      Goal ko by summer makapag bikini ako. Hahahaha. Joke lang. -_-

  2. I’ve lived my whole life believing the worst of myself. I’m ugly and stupid and worthless – these are the things that my parents and my first husband entrenched into my thoughts and feelings. I found The Viking though, and then I started to write about myself and it turns out I’m none of the above. My weight is an issue, but I changed my inner monologue to “I’ve got this! I can eat healthy for a day or two. Easy.” My own demons are my biggest enemies.

    I hope you feel better soon. :o)

    • Thank you! Your words mean a lot to me. You don’t know how sad I am. Also hearing from people that I am fat, etc. It hurts me and my pride.

      I will change the way I think. It is the next step. Again, many thanks. I find courage and hope in your experience 🙂

      • Also…..I’ve been to the darkest place imaginable where no hope lives and it was only fear that saved me. When I left that place – with the help of a wonderful psychologist and some short term meds – and came out into the sun, I felt like a Survivor. Many people don’t survive, but I did. And you will too. Send me an email any time you want. I’ll catch you. I promise.

        • Thank you I will reach out if I ever feel like I’m beginning to enter a dark place. Writing about it has been a positive release. I have been writing lately to help me get it out of my system.

  3. Please don’t blame yourself. I know you will get lots of advice both good and bad. My Mother’s family was overweight. Guess what itvin the genetic makeup. Have your self tested for Celiac disease. One of the symptoms is craving sweets. That is me.My brothers were diagnose first so I found out my problem. It does effect you female harmones. When I fi rst went on the diet I lost 60#. I have since gain some back. Wheat is everywhere, it is hard to get away from it. Good Luck as you make healthy choices. Think Positive!

    • I will make sure to get myself tested and make better health choices. It is hard but I will try my best! Thank you so much Betty 🙂

      • One thing I found that helps me. Whenever I find myself thinking about going off the diet, I remember how sick I was. I don’t want the food.

  4. Please be gentle with yourself. Rather than blame yourself focus on moving forward and working toward meeting your goals. You can do it ☺

    • Thank you Amie! I woke up this morning feeling really discouraged with this weight thing and decided that I just have to find it in me to beat it. I know the way will be tough but I can do it! Thank you for your wonderful reminder. 🙂

  5. I am glad you will willing to focus on your health and my only suggestion is to not blame yourself. As long as you can work on something that you want in life, you are doing it right is my belief.

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